Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Corner time

John says it's been too long since I've posted.  Things have been crazy around here (what's new right?) and we've been working opposite each other.  When he's off, I'm working and when I'm off, he's working so things in Dd have been slow to say the least.  It's like we're passing ships these days.  Sunday though we're going on a date.  We have tickets to a concert and are going out to eat before hand so we'll be able to catch up but until then I'm off tonight, tomorrow night and Friday night but he works all those nights, then I work Saturday night but he's off, it's been like that since last Friday night. :(

I figured on this post I'll talk about corner time.  He tried it once a long time ago.  We tried things out for a while before this thing actually took off and we became serious about it.  One of the things he tried was corner time.  I pouted, said no, then stomped off to our bedroom and we've not done it since.  I don't think either one of us was serious about Dd back then.  He was wildly inconsistent and I wanted to top from the bottom as the saying goes.  I'd done most of the research and knew more about how other people do this thing than he did.  He knew next to nothing and was completely unsure of himself.  Not to mention all of those societal ideas about how this thing is "wrong".  I also wasn't sensitive to the thought that it would take him time to get used to the role of leader or HOH or that it would take time for me to learn to hand over control.  Who knew I was such a control freak.

The second time we tried this thing we do, I was more focused on what my role was and not his.  I focused on how to be a more submissive wife and focused less on his role as leader.  Once I did that I think it was easier for him to step up, he was no longer fighting me for control.  I think he felt less like he was doing it wrong too.

So back to corner time.  I think it flopped that one time we ever tried because neither one of us was in the mind set we needed to be in for a true Dd dynamic to work.  Now that we're in a better place, I think it might actually be helpful for those times my attitude starts toeing that line.  When I'm just a tiny bit snippy or grumpy when I don't need to be, but a spanking isn't warranted.  Maybe we should give it another try?  It might help bring more peace into our lives.  Things have already calmed down a bit around here and I'm starting to like a less stressful family life around here and this may help even more.  I think I'll bring it up to him to see what he thinks and I'll keep you readers up to date on how that works for us.

On another note, since John is the new HOH, I deflect a lot of decisions to him now, like whether or not the kids can play with the neighbors after homework.  If it's OK with me, I'll tell them "I'm OK with it, but you need to ask Dad" and the other day I got this response from my son "everything's ask Dad, what do I always have to go to Dad now?"  I said "because that's our new family dynamic, we both have to approve you leaving the home now".  I think it's humorous the kids are starting to notice now.

Oh, and I did take my iron today :)

2 comments:

  1. We tried CT for a couple months and I hated it so much that it created a bunch of other issues. We did battle over it every single time. Not good at all. I don't know what would happen if he tried it again now. Hopefully I've "grown up" some.

    I hope you have a good experience with it. So many women really get a lot from it!

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    1. I just kind of think maybe when I'm starting to get frustrated with the kids it might help for him to step in and remove me from the situation because my stubborn mind won't let me back down, then again it just might lead to a spanking since maybe it might fuel what's already begun, my irrationality that is.

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